Captain Dad is Now COMMANDER Dad!

My most awesome and beloved husband took command of a great group of National Guard soldiers on Saturday.

Following the change of command, the unit threw its annual Christmas party and I was impressed, delighted, and struck by some of the differences between the National Guard and the Active Duty Army.

The First Sergeant's amazing and dedicated wife organized the party with help from a small group of regulars and created a real festive scene. There was tons of food--turkey, baked ham, roast pig, fried chicken, sweet potatoes, salad, arroz con frijoles, breads, pies, cookies, well...you get the idea. A local teacher and his band provided the entertainment--a mix of 70s dance music, popular latin numbers, and some Christmas classics. Besides the soldiers, there were unit alumni, junior cadets, the teacher's class of "troubled teens," and other community members.

Without the red tape of the regular rules and bureacracy, the party planners had more freedom to make the event work.

There were so many adorable children running around, playing on the castle bounce, making hand painted ornaments, and playing with new toys. The highlight for the younger set was Santa's arrival on a Humvee!

I really got the sense that the soldiers and families love children as babies were passed from friend to friend, toddlers entertained, and older kids drawn into the singing and dancing.

Because not all of the soldiers had Class As, there was an interesting mix of uniforms and civilian wear on display, including a nehru jacket and a zoot suit.

With the vibrant neighborhood relationship and the obvious unit esprit de corps, I did not miss the regular army's commitment to precision and uniformity.

Because National Guard members may spend their entire career with the unit, it was clear we were joining a close-knit family.

A lot of this also has to do with the community and how the armory is integrated into its urban neighborhood.

The one somber note came with a presentation of memorial plaques to family members of two fallen soldiers--some volunteers from the unit are part of a deployment to Afghanistan.

Even that sad note was a beautiful reminder of how much these soldiers care for one another.

I am proud to be a part of the family of this new unit and very proud of my husband's service to our country.

Army National Guard Family Readiness Group

If you are National Guard, I'd love to hear about your Family Readiness Group.

While my husband was active duty, I ran one FRG long-distance (during his OCS--and we were spread out throughout the country) and was the co-leader for another (while his unit was deployed).

During the last year he has been in the National Guard. No one has contacted me about any sort of family group, although I received some general information about the National Guard family programs when DH first joined his unit. They seemed interested in volunteers, but only mentioned something about me going to a training program and that was the last I heard of it.

Now DH is about to take command. His unit is not slated to deploy as a unit during his command. I'm not sure what, if any, contact from me would be desirable for the families. A simple letter just so you know my name and contact information should you ever want to reach me? An invitation to a family day? Monthly e-mail updates about the unit's training?

So, any insight from y'all would be much appreciated. Feel free to answer whichever questions you like and add your own thoughts:

Have you been contacted by an FRG representative?

If so, was that representative military personnel, a civilian employee, or a family volunteer?

Is your spouse deployed/deploying?

Is your spouse's NG unit deploying as a unit?

Are there events (Holiday Parties, Picnics, etc.) hosted for families in your spouse's unit and, if so, have you attended? Why or why not?

Would you attend family events if you were available on that date? Why or why not?

What would you like to see from an NG FRG while your spouse is stateside?

What about while your spouse is deployed?

What information would you like to receive in a letter from your spouse's commander and/or the FRG leader?

When the Soldier's Away, the Blogger Will Be Silent?

For the military wife bloggers out there, or anyone whose husband is frequently gone on business trips, do you blog when the soldier is away from home? Do you feel you have enough anonymity or are you not concerned about any safety issues? Does it matter if he is away for a shorter or longer time? (I'm assuming male spouses don't worry about this...but maybe I'm wrong.)

When DH was active duty, I always felt uncomfortable blogging about his absence while he was on field exercises...yet, I blogged about his deployment while he was gone.

It does not make a ton of sense, but I think part of it was the fact that there was no way to avoid the issue of his deployment on a Military Spouse blog and another part was, living in Killeen, it wouldn't be that hard for someone to figure out whose spouse was gone anyway. So, blogging about the deployment, on an anonymous blog, didn't seem to add significantly to the safety risk.

Since then, I've started a number of other online projects that are connected with my real name. And people who know me in real life have discovered this blog (and that's a whole 'nother can of worms).

DH has left Active Duty, but is still in the National Guard.

Suddenly, when he leaves, I feel exposed.

This time, I feel comfortable blogging about his absense because I'll have family visiting. He's headed off to Captain's Career Course in preparation for taking command this summer. But generally, if he will be gone overnight, I just don't say anything.

How about you? What are your thoughts and comfort level on this topic?

Just when I thought that I was out...

...they pull me back in.

No, DH has not been called back up from IRR (Individual Ready Reserve). We are still leaving active duty.

However, DH has decided that, in addition to his work as an Assistant District Attorney, he will join the New York National Guard for a few reasons.

In no particular order:

• He wants to continue serving his nation.
• They will stabilize him for two years and cut his IRR commitment in half
• He likes the military

So...now I will find myself in an entirely different sort of military spouse role. Any advice from current or former guard spouses?